gender studies

A letter to Baileys: from Jeremy

Age 12 | 2nd Year at Bailey’s Cafe

Sincerely, Jeremy

I was here at Bailey’s a year ago. The first year was hard because I had no one to talk to. This year was easier because I have been able to talk and make friends with people here.

My favorite part of Bailey’s was talking to Kadeem, during Gender Studies on Tuesday afternoons, because he makes me feel good and makes me feel comfortable to express my feelings and makes me feel welcome.

For What’s in Your Hands? I worked with Brian, Zev and Shelby at the BedStuy Community Garden. The garden was fun to do but it was also hard to work with people. I had to learn that in order for people to treat me the way I wanted, which was to be nicer to me, I had to be nicer and not get mad and walk away all the time. When I had to overcome something I would sit alone and once I walked away and went back to Bailey’s because I was so sad and mad. All I really wanted was just to fit in.

What helped me to understand that by walking away I will never fit in or make friends was something Kadeem taught me. He told me I wasn’t allowed to say, “none of your business” in situations where people don’t understand why I am upset with them but need to explain my feelings so they can understand. Sometimes though, things can be overstimulating which make it hard for me to concentrate on certain things and to deal with this I sometimes still just have to walk away and take some moments for myself. But I know to fit back in I will need to explain myself so people can understand how I handle certain things.

I am looking forward to having friends who like the same things as me–like taking pics and videos and trains and buses. I am also looking forward to not being wimp but standing up for myself when I feel that I am being disrespected. I understand that if I treat everyone with respect they will respect me. I am anxious about going back to school but I have my tech teacher I can call and he will help me to feel better.

Kids area

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Returning by Pharaoh B.

Baileys is very welcoming and makes you feel at home.




Bailey’s Café is a place where you can do so many different activities, have fun and spend your time wisely. Every day at Bailey’s at 12:30pm, we have lunchtime. During lunch, it’s an opportunity to talk with the other participants in the program and connect with others in the group; we are free to go out during lunch and explore Bed-Stuy, or stay at Bailey’s and have free time for an hour. A lot of times, I went to play basketball in the park nearby with the other boys, while some of the girls like Kendra and Nevaeh would play Just Dance. Another thing I enjoy about Baileys is they offer the choice of not doing certain things if you cannot do them for religious or other reasons. This really helped me feel included in the program because there were certain activities I could not take part in, but Ms. Stefanie gave me and the other kids activities to do during these times.

I attended Bailey’s summer program when I was younger and we were focused on preparing for a performance..


This summer Bailey’s offered many different kinds of activities from yoga to art to gardening to photography. I attended Bailey’s summer program when I was younger and we were focused on preparing for a performance. At that time, I wasn’t able to digest the information as well. This year I was able to get more out of the experience.

The teachers are very friendly and treated me as if I was here for the whole time, especially Kadeem; but that’s also because we have known each other for a longtime, even before I came to Bailey’s. He is a dance teacher and also facilitates gender studies for the boys. During gender studies, we have a safe space where we can tell each other everything that we are going through without the stress of somebody telling somebody. Everyone at Bailey’s is very welcoming and makes you feel at home.

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